Soaring

Harsh words are spoken.

The visions I had are shattered.

Promises broken,

obviously, they never mattered.

Flying through the clouds now I'm free.

High above atrocities, the Hawk is me.

I'm gonna fly forever, I'm never coming down.

My spirit soaring faster, so far above the ground.

I must've been listening, I heard the changes coming.

Watching your reactions, relized I meant nothing.

Now I'm choking on the clouds I thought were mine.

Will I have to fly forever, alone for all my time.

My spirit soaring faster, my soul is left unsound.

Surrounded by society, I never left the ground.

— themoonman, Dec 09, 2007

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: South Carolina, United States, USA

Critiques

Mark

18 years 6 months ago

moonman this was going in a direction

a direction that was telling me you were set free after something bad like a relationship probably. But then you used the word atrocities and I have to think you are lucky to be freed from it. I kind of felt atrocities too strong a word for the poem but I suppose it can fit there when you really think about it. Thanks, Mark

themoonman

18 years 6 months ago

Hi Mark, thanks for the

Hi Mark, thanks for the response...You are right, atrocities is probobly too strong...but life is sometimes tragic...and you can't get away from it....

Ancientone

18 years 6 months ago

Yes you can....

get away from it, by your very own words, soar with the eagles, keep your wits about you and look for the good of what happened, then be forward looking. I know from quite recent experience that when and where bad things happen is but a stepping off point to real happiness. Let go, please, that's all that's needed in reality. I know it's not easy and grieving is the first stage. Take your time and you will see that the Dalai Lama is right. Sometimes it luckier not to get what you think you wanted. :) Patrick/AO

Janice Pearce

17 years 6 months ago

Soaring

Moon, I like the twist at the end very nice~ I guess we all feel the need to flee from a troubled relationship and what better way, than soaring like the eagle? _____________________________ To write a touching poem, you must gently stir the soul, if it brings forth tears or smiles, then the story was beautifully told. ________Janice Pearce_________

Seren

16 years 9 months ago

Dear Richard

I often read through old writes and this one caught my imagination and took me away on the wings of an eagle lifted even at the end, by a weight as such ... loved this write Love Jayne x x

themoonman

16 years 9 months ago

Hi Jayne...

you really went digging to find this old one... thanks so much! this one I haven't even read in quite a while... I remember writing it... Richard