Neopoet

Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

C
Calliope
Oct 29, 2007 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Revery

Have you ever had a feeling that wouldn't go away?

Or a premonition ,maybe ,and the shadow of it stayed?

A darkness that hovered not far behind?

A weight on your shoulders of which relief you can't find?

And the solutions seemingly float in our midst,

We reach out to grab them,But always miss.

When will we know the unknown?

Will the answers one day be shown?

Cast away my pain and woes,cast away my misery,

Cast away my shame and sorrows,and banish me to a revery.

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: New York, USA

More from this author

Comments

H

HiFlyGuy

18 years 6 months ago

I like it

You've hit a very common thread amongst those who suffer. Nicely written with good movement. I could feel this one as I read it. I will look forward to seeing more from you.
C

Conect11

18 years 6 months ago

I do dig

the rhythm you've given yourself in the begining and middle of the poem. Towards the end I think it stumbles a bit, perhaps the repetition could be broken up a bit, I don't know. The poem reads a bit like an abstract rather than concrete, IMHO. On a lighter note, I see you've got a loyal fan boy in hiflyguy! (watch out, I think he's trying to get laid!) = ) lighten up folks if you're offended, we're all friends here! welcome to neopoet :) Mark W.
H

HiFlyGuy

18 years 6 months ago

A lighter note continued...

Oh Mark, don't be jealous...I loved your manic sense in Warsteiner Rant...what was that about the Germans again? Oh that's right, "Superior" and "Arian"....are YOU trying to turn ME on?
C

Conect11

18 years 6 months ago

roflmao

nice! The beer was the aphrodisiac for me! Mark W.
C

Calliope

18 years 6 months ago

Easy Boys

Cockfights tend to get messy,lmao.Although I think I may be flattered,lol Lacy, Where power corrupts,poetry cleanses.
C

Calliope

18 years 6 months ago

Ahhh

Your a smooth operater.O' what more there is to share,lol.[I'm so blushing right now] Lacy, Where power corrupts,poetry cleanses.
I

IKnowNoBox

18 years 6 months ago

Hello Lacy, After the last Question verses you ...

seemed to do a daring pull back into the poem I think 11 said it well.The theme though is a sharp one for sure. I have a short story I put up "When I Don't Listen". as a sa"gut"arius I pay dearly for not listening to my premanitions and such.So don't yank the engine out just rotate the tires a little,and message me if you do. In ink, Boxless