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Conect11
Sep 25, 2007 ⭐ See this poem's read count — a supporter feature

Short Theology Poem in Three Parts

 Part 1: Question   What’s a Theist?   Part 2: Jess   Once a Theist.   Part 3: Mark   Always a Theist!    
— Conect11, Sep 25, 2007
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Critiques

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Michael Landau

18 years 10 months ago

What did you think of my

What did you think of my title? The title is a good. How was my language use? The language used is poor. The rhythm or pattern or pacing? The rhyming is poor. How does this theme appeal to you? If only a small group of people know what the poem is about, I don't really consider that it is a poem. To most people this would mean absolutely nothing. I mean, it is a poem, but only the people who have been following your theology discussion know what it means. How was the beginning/ending of the poem? Ok. Is the internal logic consistent? Yes.
Frost Smith

Frost Smith

18 years 10 months ago

Poem is a poem if you say it is a poem...

I was trying to defuse the situation from the earlier poem by not commenting on it Micheal...I do my reasearch before commenting...I will again try to take the high road; close for now.
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Conect11

18 years 10 months ago

I am lost...

which situation? Which earlier poem? Am I involved somehow? Mark W.
Frost Smith

Frost Smith

18 years 10 months ago

Connect11 (Mark)...

I believe he is referring to your "Haiku from a Christian to an Atheist" poem, perhaps he doesn't know that you and jess are friends.
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Conect11

18 years 10 months ago

yeah,

am sensing that. I put a comment on that one referring to just what you mentioned. Funny enough, that haiku was written to be light hearted and humorous. Mark W.
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Conect11

18 years 10 months ago

I'm seeing that!

we've all currently written comments and reviews equal to 10,000 times the size of the original poem! Mark W.
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Conect11

18 years 10 months ago

ok

excellent. I am super glad you are commenting. Now, let's make it constructive. Why is the language used poor? The rhyming? What would you suggest, if you were to mentor me, to improve on that? I look forward to your constructive feedback, Michael! :) Mark W.
ML

Michael Landau

18 years 10 months ago

You may find this a silly

You may find this a silly suggestion, but it took me a long time to figure out what this poem means. I think the addition of the word question by number 1 clarifies things a lot for me. Part 1: Question What’s a Theist? Part 2: Jess Once a Theist. Part 3: Mark Always a Theist! You put a title for part 2 and part 3 but no title for part 1. When I add the title for part 1 , the meaning becomes clear to me. By the addition of a title for part 1, it now becomes clear that the three parts make up one riddle. That was not clear before, now I think it is! What do you think? Michael
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Conect11

18 years 10 months ago

I actually struggled

with putting that or something similar as a title for part one. Now that I have some support to that thought maybe I'll do it. Thanks! Mark W.
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orgami

18 years 10 months ago

a=a

"a" splendid poem
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Quillsvein1

18 years 10 months ago

a

nice play on words and also very clever (a)theissst...the phonetics make you think. i once knew a girl who defined herself as an "apatheist". wonderful

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