freight train brain

The freight train comes around the bend

Twisted thoughts run through my head

I close my eyes but still I see

Laying my head down tortures me

Vivid visions constantly flash

Hopes for serenity are dashed

Every night it is habitual

I can’t get used to this ritual

I just want to sleep

Instead all I do is weep

— Frost Smith, Aug 26, 2007

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

Critiques

Quillsvein1

18 years 9 months ago

i

think you write very well about pain and inner torment, and no matter what any facile optimist might say, there's quite a bit to be said for that--many great poets have written exclusively about the suffering of human life. but for us mortals, varying in theme from time to time is not just a good idea but is a necessity to become a genuine writer of any sort. you have obvious talent and it would be a great idea to expand on it with a different theme. nice job on this one.

Frost Smith

18 years 2 months ago

quillsvein1...

I never thanked you; my very next poem was a departure; dark yes; but not angry or tormented. and I have gone on to not only write on different topics, and also passed the same suggestion on to other poets here on the site. Your comment really helped me Frost

poewriter58

18 years 2 months ago

Frost

A very different reaction to levels of pain and stress than I had expressed the agony and torment is strongly felt through this work. I think though it may be what brought it on in the first place I've had times when hell would have been more preferable Chrys

Frost Smith

18 years 2 months ago

Chrys...

I am a resident of hell more than not; moments of peace are my exception, not the rule. However; I have found that no matter what my emotional state I just have to keep moving foward in my actions; not take it out on the world, then it passes before the next round. Thank you Frost