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weirdelf
weirdelf
Jul 31, 2007 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Afternoon delight

 

When they fucked
God woke up,
fell off his throne
and rolled down the stairway from heaven.

Landing on earth he looked at the state of things and said
“My Self! Did I do this?”

The answer to this question
involved admitting either that
he wasn’t
omniscient
or omnipotent
or that he had fucked up,
all intolerable conclusions,
of course.

So he doddled off to an old gods home.
Where his reception was
enthusiastically hostile.

He had, after all,
been responsible
for most of their retirements.

Those who fucked joyously,
in the meantime,
had noticed nothing,
except a desire
to do it again.

 

 


— weirdelf, Jul 31, 2007

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Sydney, Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: The Romantics, The Mersey Sound, The Beats and, of course, The Bard

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More from this author

Critiques

A

Ancientone

18 years 2 months ago

God and humor!

Nice work, Jess, you just fucked with God. I'm sure just as I sit here that he will send a bolt of lightening somewhere, someday and strike somebody for your blasphemy. It could be me, dammit! So watch it! God has a very weird sense of humor ya know, you might even call it sadistic. ;) Patrick/AO
Q

Quillsvein1

18 years 10 months ago

subtly

amusing and very well paced. the rhythm of your skepticism and joy in the natural is well paced and unmistakable. great job!
I

IcePrincess

18 years 10 months ago

As Usual

As usual your work makes me think, smile, relax from the hectic thing I call my life. Eternity and a day, that is how long true love lasts.
LC

Lenny of Cohen

18 years 10 months ago

SUPERB!!!

Your brilliant piece of work had me thinking and laughing! I have these crazy images of God and his face being a picture of shock and shame!!! I wonder if he has a nice nurse in the home?!!! Lenny
weirdelf

weirdelf

18 years 10 months ago

LOL

your comment goes so well with your pic! cheers, Jess
C

Conect11

18 years 10 months ago

:)

I wish I could hate your God poems, but you actually write much like my Reverend. Interestingly enough I wonder often about the Christian concept of "perfect" as in "God is perfect." Case in point, God is seen repenting of evil he had done in the book of Exodus. An interesting thought can be brought from that. Mark
weirdelf

weirdelf

18 years 10 months ago

crikey!

wait till the blokes down the pub hear I write like a reverend! cheers, Jess
C

Conect11

18 years 10 months ago

damnit!

you said one of the drinking words! I have to take a slug of 10 year old scotch now. Everytime you say words like "crikey," "g'day," and "mate" I have to take a drink. BTW, meant to ask you this, being I'm a chef and all: what are some dishes that might be indicative of the Sydney area, and your country? Just curious because local cuisine is soooooo much better than the homogenized crap served up at 95% of eateries in the "civilizied world." Mark
weirdelf

weirdelf

18 years 10 months ago

sydney food has no identity

we do pride ourselves on being able to offer the very best of any nationalities cuisine, but there is no such thing as Sydney or Australian food. Excepting Aboriginal food which is not generally on offer. cheers, Jess
H

HDGoodman

18 years 10 months ago

were you brought up a catholic?

cause the ole fart upstairs gets fair licked in some of your gear. i like him as one of your characters.
weirdelf

weirdelf

18 years 10 months ago

ta mate

Nah, was raised CofE but the old man was a fundamentalist and a member of the Festival of Light, old bastard actually voted for Fred Nile! That is not why I am not a Christian though, I was for many years but stopped when I couldn't get satisfactory answers to questions like what happens to non-christians and the whole original sin thing. cheers, Jess
C

Conect11

18 years 10 months ago

well,

not sure I can satisfactorily answer your questions, nor did you ask me to, but if I may be permitted to divulge: The book of Revelations(7:9) does in fact talk about what will happen to non - Christians. (and in this case I'm not talking about the people who sided with the Devil, but who grew up where Christ was not known. John sees a great multitude of peoples (faiths, countries, colors) praising God together and standing side by side, along with all of creation. Hope that's a start on answering your question, that in fact you didn't ask, but... uh... well, ok you didn't actually ask a question. Mark
weirdelf

weirdelf

18 years 10 months ago

thanks man

now why didn't anyone tell me about that passage when I was 15 and questioning my faith? Not that I think the final result would have been different. At the time I couldn't distinguish between personal belief and organised religion. I may never be a christian but at least I am no longer bigoted against them, you would be safe at one of my barbecues or meeting my pet lions... well fairly safe, cheers, Jess
C

Conect11

18 years 10 months ago

just

call me Daniel, then. lol! Had two miraculous things happen to me on Saturday. Remind me to tell you about them if I don't write the poem first. Mark
W

Westley

18 years 8 months ago

Really like this. I like the

Really like this. I like the image that you have created out of the patriachal god. It also alludes to a sense of each individual creating their own realities on the one hand, and the ignorance that seems tp prevail in our deluded times.
I

IKnowNoBox

18 years 8 months ago

I ate T.V. dinners with God?

KWIM? Weird if you ever read a graphic novel pick up a copy of Preacher I feel you will enjoy it's morbid story! Richly Blessed, IKnow...
Barbara Writes

Barbara Writes

16 years 1 month ago

I see you on a role

After reading, this is what came to mind. The Devil sits on a throne as a God misleading the entire inhabitant earth Rev. 12:10. I'm not preaching at you, no opinion for or against this ingenious write. ~~~~~~~~~ If you don't like it, can't talk about it, then write about it. Respectfully Yours, Barbara
Seren

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

I can only smile … cheeky

I can only smile ... cheeky larconic Aussie you are ... btw I am reading this as a poem not an offence to god ... I look at it like this and it maybe simple but its the way I see it , if he didnt like us taking the piss ? why would he give us free will to do so ... love and hugs Jayne-Chloe (http://www.neopoet.com/forum/36627-meet-n-greet-live-chat-thurs-apr-15th-9-11-pm-ny-est-host-poewriter58-welcome-new-member#comment-175177) ... Be there ~!~!~!
Seren

Seren

16 years 1 month ago

there are a number of

there are a number of conclusions I would draw Jess but if I am wrong I shouldnt be here either lol love and hugs Jayne-Chloe x x (http://www.neopoet.com/forum/36627-meet-n-greet-live-chat-thurs-apr-15th-9-11-pm-ny-est-host-poewriter58-welcome-new-member#comment-175177) ... Be there ~!~!~!
P

panaella

16 years 1 month ago

really funny

I loved the image of god as a washed -up old fart in a nursing home! As a 'lapsed' catholic...i'm on level 3 of Dante's levels of Hell by now!...(all your fault...well..ok, just a little part) I laughed outloud...rare for me. luv Ells x
weirdelf

weirdelf

16 years 1 month ago

chuffed! an actual laugh out loud is rare indeed

although there is a serious underpinning to this that seems to have largely overlooked. Tantric sex, which I have practiced and in its purest form uses the sex act as an exulatation of the fuck between Shakti and Shiva which creates the universe. Cheers, Jess, Reprehensibly irrepressible