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Frozen in the Park

Its a bad dream.

Then she awakens, with a scream.

The night is still dark.

Ice covered gates in the park.

She lies, silently chilling.

If only she was a state of a mind, to be  willing.

Then at home she would be in front of the fire.

But its her way of dealing with a liar.

Her way of saying.

I don’t need you husband

Quivering voice displaying.

Therefore why she is in this parkland.

Sounds in the night make her tense.

The night magnifies them and makes them immense.

Nowhere to turn.

Nowhere to hide.

Brain numbed to the core.

Over her he chose a whore.

She shivers.

This is never.

The way to resolve.

Or absolve.

Him for what he’s done.

Something now ended before its begun.

Where is the respect.

What does he expect.

After all she is just human.

Without thinking she opened the door and ran.

He kept calling after her.

Her back resting against the huge fir.

But how was she to deal with it.

Never told you in the marriage vows

Adultery sure is shit.

Did he really need to call her a cow.

Still numbed.

She succumbed.

Picking up her frozen body.

No sense of feeling.

Her head still reeling.

She begins to walk home alone.

Unaware what to say and how to deal.

With betrayal.

Now she decided she would no longer be loyal.

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

— kinganeye, Jul 16, 2007

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Country/Region: USA

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Critiques

weirdelf

weirdelf

18 years 10 months ago

honestly mate

I don't think rhyming couplets work for you in serious verse. You weaken your expression with heavy-handed inversions like "Over her he chose a whore." which is only there to make the rhyme. The poem does manage to capture some of the emotion around the scene, but the rhyming scheme and most especially the cliched last line, let it down. cheers, Jess