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O

whole of words

 

 

stood by the fresh heat of pavement

as words soothed from your throat

lingered with the speeding airs

of cars and motorbikes

 

i could not help but stare and

linger

softly singing lyrics long

forgotten

as your taut hand strummed

steel strings

and chords rang out from

your weathered guitar

 

i threw a dollar in your hat

 

and four blocks away your

song plays on

in this simple day

this whole

of worlds

 

..O..

— orgami, Jul 12, 2007

Critiques

SS

Spirit Song

18 years 11 months ago

Imagery filled delivery!

Excellent word artistry with imagery that flowed flawlessly down the page bringing the reader into the moment. Minor typo "frresh" and did you mean to close out with "Word" as in your title as opposed to "World"? Aloha from Hawaii, Jerry It is said there are two ways of doing things The right way and the wrong way I believe there is a third way A NEW WAY JVS
O

orgami

18 years 11 months ago

the whorl of words of worlds

worlds my freind as in world within a world like a dream within a dream encapsulated like a pupae growing stretching reaching for that moment to emerge skip of stone lift of wing to be in the warmth of the last day of a seasons passing world there are so many contexts ..O..
Q

Quillsvein1

18 years 11 months ago

sleek

Your lines are naturally poetic and without concern for the strangulation of form..sometimes that is good, sometimes that is bad, and in this case it is most definitely good. Great, fresh job!
C

Conect11

18 years 11 months ago

Orgami,

this is the most visual work of yours I have seen. you've interspersed the story of the street musicians in vivid true life perfectly with your impressionist style. I could hear the music in my brain as I imagined walking down Wabash Street in Chicago. Stanza two is direct and real, my favorite of this piece. Good stuff here. Mark

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