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AP
A. M. Painter
Jul 12, 2007 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

I am Nothing

I am breaking apart in your eyes
Underneath this brilliant disguise
I am truly nothing
 
I am broke in the middle of the road
like the love we used to show
I am truly nothing
 
Nobody told me
That this would always haunt me
Forever and more
Just look at me, I am going no where
Broken down, in this time share
I have no one to cry to
I have no one to be with now
I am truly nothing
my heart, is nothing
my eyes, are blinded
and I am a failure
to you and to everyone, who ever tried
 
I am helpless like watching a polar bear freeze
Or to stop the wind that blows these trees
I am truly nothing
 
Nobody told me
that this would always haunt me
forever and always, I just cant let go
look at me, I am nothing
look at me now, I am going no where
so confused right not, everything is unclear
I have no one to go to lie to
I have no one to go to and love
I am nothing
truly nothing
My heart, feels nothing
My eyes, see nothing
I am a failure
to you, and to everyone around me
 
I am nothing to you now
all the words that I just cant mouth
I am truly nothing
 
I am breaking apart in your eyes
coming true to all of these lies
you never deserved it but I didn’t deserve you
I am nothing, and that is the cold blooded truth

— A. M. Painter, Jul 12, 2007
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Critiques

weirdelf

weirdelf

18 years 11 months ago

tough titties

gonna give you some harsh feedback even though you asked for moderate. This is a verbatim of a dialogue I had with a therapist about a lost love: I can't stop thinking about her yes you can, just decide to. no I can't so you want to keep feeling the way you do? Ok, I can stop thinking about her, cheers, Jess
AP

A. M. Painter

18 years 11 months ago

well

as soon as i do, i will tell you, shit, ill post it as a blog so everyone can reply how happy they will be that everything i write isnt from the same perspective. i think what i need to do is just find someone else that makes me feel the same way. thats really hard though, because it seems when you look for love you always miss it, but if you let it come to you, it shows itself... a.m. painter
C

Conect11

18 years 11 months ago

*buzzer!!!!*

ERRRRRRRRRRRR! WRONG AGAIN! The LAST thing on Earth you want to do right now is find somebody else! Buddy, the best way I can tell you this is that two half people do not make a whole person, and until you get over this chick you are half a person. The thing is, you can't will yourself into getting over her. My first real love, I still pathetically called her three years after we broke up. Despite the crap she pulled on me I made every excuse in the world for her behavior, even years after we stopped talking. I dated other people after her, but I wouldn't let her go until I started respecting myself. You can tell me all you want you respect yourself, but I see in your writing that you don't. Get a hobby, hang with your friends, take some college classes, act in plays, sing in a damn choir, play sports, to stuff WITH OTHER PEOPLE. But realize that other people will not, will not, will not make you whole. Only God and you can do that. And it takes time, effort, and perseverance. Mark
AP

A. M. Painter

18 years 11 months ago

this is very true

i have even realized this myself, i have tried to have other relationships but nothign seems to work, i always end up talking about her. so i dont know what the next step is, you say to gain self respect, i am not sure that i know how to do that, i played football and wrestling and i work alot, i hang out with friends every chance i get so i dont think about it but i still do. i am going to college this fall and i cant wait, i want to forget old memories and make new ones. (by forget i mean not be cognitive of them every moment). any suggestions on how to move on, although i think it may be something to find out on my own. by the way, what did you think of the poem mark? a.m. painter
C

Conect11

18 years 11 months ago

I think

that yes, you have to find your own way there. Everybody's experiences vary. I think you'll be just fine, what you're going through is something we all have to endure. And endure we do. As to your poem, I expect better from you. It's helpless, "woah is me," and the viewpoint (not necc the writing) is pathetic. Again, please take this in friendship, not trying to piss down your throat. I'm sorry my friend, I just can't read more of the same poem from you. Hell, at this point I want to slap your ex myself! Mark

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