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The Tiny Bike

A tiny bike

Mangled and broken

Blood on the pavement

Traffic backed up

Blue and red flashing in my eyes

The sound of sirens

Prayers in my heart

The bike was so small

The truck so big

Without a thought

The tears start to fall

How could someone not see

Where were the parents

Do they even know

My eyes on the bike once more

Passing by

I couldn’t help but to cry

— poet_inside, Jul 08, 2007

Critiques

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Conect11

18 years 11 months ago

you are

what we call flooding. No matter how important the subject matter is you've made it get lost with the constant posting. I encourage you to keep writing, and to post, just remember that when you post this much it makes it very difficult for you to get honest, constructive feedback besides the "ooh, I like that" that doesn't really to you anything. Pace yourself, I'm sure you have plenty of fabulous work that we would love to read, and will with a constructive eye. Mark
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poet_inside

18 years 11 months ago

Yes

Yes I understand the idea of flooding as someone has once already said something about posting so much at one time, I believe it was Jess. Which is why I ONLY posted 3 poems yesturday, so the point had already been made and I got it. I posted 24 on here my first day and realized what Jess ment after I had already made the posts.. I honestly don't think 3 poems is concidered flooding..... but hey I guess it might be.........
C

Conect11

18 years 11 months ago

no no no

hey, I suppose I should have looked that you only did three yesterday, so my bad if that was the case. No need to get defensive, we're all friends here :) Mark
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poet_inside

18 years 11 months ago

Sorry

Sorry if I came across being definsive. All is well, you were only trying to help. Have a good one. Brittany

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