Desert

I liked the similes, personification and devices you used. Yet the structure seemed a bit off. Your fist stanze, last line, makes no sense to me...I'm not sure what you meant by "one" Did you mean to make it water? The first and secon stanza doesn't coincide with the first and last.You should switch the second and last stanza and add another stanza to elaborate on the thought presented in the second stanza. Good start Thanks for the read

is a really beautiful, evocative line. And the rest of the poem has meaning beyond its apparent simplicity, a quality I very much admire in poetry, perhaps a necesssity. But don't go the Sylvia Plath path. You are not dying (even if you are) because you are creating. It's much easier to write depressing poetry than living poetry and that is the challenge. cheers