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Observations of an Amphibious Creature

Frog he hops,
Then he stops.
Tadpole sees.

— Alex Tanner, Aug 27, 2024

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: Isle of Wight United Kingdom

Favorite Poets: Poe, Swinburn, Bob Dylan, Spike Milligan, Alfred Noyes, Kipling., Many Others.

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Critiques

Rula

Rula

1 year 10 months ago

Hello Alex

I don't claim that I'm getting this one hundred percent, but I always applaud the brevity that goes with a message and always assume that others are much brighter than I.
I thought it might have sth to do with growth and transformation,
Am I even close?

Alex Tanner

Alex Tanner

1 year 10 months ago

Hello Rula

Don't think about it. What is there to get? It's just three lines. Be brighter than most, don't look for what isn't there. Alex.

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

1 year 10 months ago

Dear Alex,

I like the abruptness of this poem...no clutter!

*hugs, Cat

Lavender

Lavender

1 year 10 months ago

Observations of an Amphibious Creature

Hello, Alex!
Really like this! Fun title! The "aha" feeling I love in minimal, observational poetry. I'm right there with that tadpole...
I do wonder about removing "the" from the first and third lines. They don't seem necessary, and then you will have three crisp, 3-syllable lines. Just a thought.
Thank you!
L

Lavender

Lavender

1 year 10 months ago

Hello, Alex,

Just a big grin with this one. Somewhere out there, this is really going' on...
L

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