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Jul 19, 2022
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City Ruins
Gathering around the city of white,
Pestilence, famine, and lack of elixir,
Things any man would fear,
Upon the arrival of death before their gates,
For an end of all ends, the city braced.
— Dystopia, Jul 19, 2022
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About This Poem
Last Few Words: This was written pre-pandemic… the irony.
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Not actively editing
Critiques
Rosewood Apothecary
3 years 10 months ago
I love it
One thing…
Gathering around the city of white,
Pestilence, famine, and lack of elixir,
Things any man would fear,
Upon the arrival of death before their gates,
For an end of all ends, the city braced.
Saying upon twice is very redundant but this means exactly the same thing. Please take my suggestions lightly. Really cool poem.
Tim
Dystopia
3 years 10 months ago
Thanks for the suggestion! I
Thanks for the suggestion! I didn’t even notice that!