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PT
Patrick Terrence
Member since January 9, 2023
Member for 3 years, 4 months
member
5
Poems
14
Comments
1
Follower
Most recent
Like a ladybug
he appears on the dance floor
a singular soul
in the midst of the crowd
like the shine of her wings
his suit coat stands out
with trousers to match
a myriad of colour
the Celtic patterns
of yin and yang twirls
already a dance
for the eyes of the seated
to stare in wonder
but ’t’s in the red shoes
that the wonder gasps
as they tap out the steps
of a quickstep solo
bizarre and obverse
to the noise of the band.
Patrick Terrence’s timeline
- January 2024
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09 TueAnniversary
One year of membership
- March 2023
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04 SatCritiqued
"Uninhibited Lady..." by @Geezer
"Wow, Geezer, that's scary. I like the rhythm and rhyme throughout, and the first two stanzas I thought would be a poem nice and light but then it got predatory and it seemed to me you were speaking about some of the ram…" -
04 Sat
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02 ThuReceived a critique
on Caught in the Act from @Candlewitch
"I loved these lines best: crafted in the skilful creativity, yes, bequeathed by a mother’s artful talents, all I hope is to be also caught in the act…of love! *hugs, Cat" -
01 WedCritiqued
"uninhibited" by @Candlewitch
"I like this, Cat. It's racy like a long sigh where many thoughts run into one another and then right at the end it slows down and leaves me with a feeling of relief and at the same time a kind of frustrated at-ease-ness…" -
01 Wed
- February 2023
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27 MonCritiqued
"Tides Of Life" by @magics02
"I'm a newbie to Neopoet, and am enjoying so many who write. This of yours today touches me to the quick and I am struck by your simplicity of line and language. I liked the lines "...thoughts / with no beginning and no…" -
22 WedCritiqued
"Between a Rock and a Soft Place" by @Michael Keens
"I was moved by your poem, Michael, and could see much of myself in the struggles and in the addiction of false thinking and useless self-talk. But your creative Muse seems to be bringing you order out of chaos. Thank yo…" -
21 TueReceived a critique
on A box of sand from @Lavender
"I didn't mean to confuse you. I saw you had it listed as free verse. There are so many rhymes here, I thought it was perhaps a different rhyme form. I would be curious as to how other readers think it should be classifi…" -
21 TueReceived a critique
on A box of sand from @Lavender
"Hello, Patrick, At first I thought this a very original and interesting rhyme pattern, and then noticed it was free verse. Still,,. a touch of rhyme here! This is dreamlike and thought-provoking. I very much like your t…" -
20 Mon
- January 2023
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26 ThuReceived a critique
on A Song to match the magic of Assisi from @Geezer
""sentence", as you say; is what is called a signature. Not necessarily meant for you in particular. I find that there are many people who write stories, poems, what have you, and when you correct them in any manner, sha…" -
26 ThuNew follower
@Candlewitch
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25 Wed
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25 WedReceived a critique
on A Song to match the magic of Assisi from @Rosewood Apothecary
"Knowing there are things I cannot know is the most beautiful contemplation and it’s the fire inside my being. Inspiring Tim" -
25 WedReceived a critique
on Caught in the Act from @Candlewitch
"Wow! this poem is exquisitely laid out in structure. i like your title, it takes form in the readers mind and is what you make of it. I was surprised by the ending, I loved it! is this form what is known as Tercets? tha…" -
25 Wed
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25 WedCritiqued
"Jenny On The Hill (by eddy styx written for a friend)" by @Candlewitch
"This is quite lovely and it flows right from beginning to end. Both the rhythm and rhyme flow naturally and it is a delight to read aloud. Musical indeed. There was just one line I thought to be contrived to fit the rhy…" -
25 WedFirst critique offered
on "Jenny On The Hill (by eddy styx written for a friend)" by @Candlewitch
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24 Tue
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24 Tue
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20 FriFirst publication
To a Late Afternoon Dahlia in a Suburban Garden
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20 Fri
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09 MonJoined Neopoet
Membership begins
First poem published 11 days later.
About Me
About me
While I was born in Auckland, most of my adult life as teacher and monk has been in different cities in New Zealand, and different places in the Pacific, Kiribati, Fiji, Tonga with some four years in Melbourne Australia. At present I like the simplicity of William Carlos Williams and the rhythm and rhyme of Robert Frost as well as the freer verse of Mary Oliver. While I've had a few poems published in local magazines and journals I have been too shy about venturing further. I look forward to this opportunity; I hope it helps me to be more daring.
Location: Manawatu-Whanganui, New Zealand
Favorite Poets
Sam Hunt
Denis Glover
Emily Dickinson
Thomas Merton
James K Baxter
T. S. Eliot
Gerard Manley Hopkins
Joy Cowley
W. B. Yeats
Recent Work
Contest Wins
This member has not yet won any contests.