The flesh.

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:

The poem has a genuinely urgent energy, and the core conceit — appetite as self-destruction, seduction as a kind of poisoning — is a compelling one with real dramatic potential. The serpent image in the fifth stanza lands with particular force because it earns its biblical resonance rather than simply borrowing it, and the final line's blunt accusation carries a satisfying sting.

The main area needing attention is precision at the level of individual phrase. "Cognitive dissidents" appears to be a mishearing of "cognitive dissonance," and while a workshop might entertain the idea that the slip is intentional wordplay, as it stands it reads as an error that breaks the spell at a crucial moment. Similarly, "hungry eyes" almost certainly wants to be "hungry" rather than "hungering," and the surrounding lines would benefit from tighter punctuation throughout — the run-on construction creates a breathless effect in places, but elsewhere it simply obscures the syntax and loses the reader. The poem's strongest moves are its active verbs and its refusal to soften the judgment against the speaker; leaning further into that clarity, rather than letting the phrasing blur, would bring the whole piece up to the standard its best moments already set.

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