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Memorial Day – 2026... the brightest and I attest

lifeless bodies bedecked, 
donned and hashtagged 
with trappings of battle hymns

strong and brave men and women 
gave their level best

crème de la crème

strongest and bravest
leaving grieving significant others

with emotional agony

within treasured chest

o'er the redoubt

the enemy did crest,
where lovely bones

of forebears for everest

battling hostility over

well fought over ass strew turf

among warring factions finessed

in manicured cemeteries 
(sacred burial grounds) ye guessed,
whence reduced to lovely bones
casualty of war didst buzzfeed
seconds before being gunned down
unlike in practice drills
with levity and camaraderie 
found gallows humor to jest
peace mongers lost stalwart soldier,
where moments before comrades 
in arms did hotly protest
fealty of instruments to slay
wantonly and indiscriminately

self evident with dead bodies 
who gave their last 
dying breath as testament 
strewn as they were felled
helter skelter across killing fields

forsook their lives eternal peace they rest
mortally wounded forever immune 
to post traumatic stress
honored and revered succumbed mortal 
electric kool-aid acid test
though I question if sacrificed life

worth a spit of land to wrest,
but nevertheless with bravado
gave full measure of primal zest.


Now pardon ma faux pas 
indicative of generic geek

a reasonable poo whet tick rhyme,
from dis po' pa try'n to be sleek
original poem crafted years gone by

necessitated minor tweak

where sense and sensibility weak.


 

Officially called Decoration Day

proclaimed on 5 May 1868

by General John Logan

first observed on 30 May 1868

Waterloo N.Y. officially

declared the birthplace

by President Lyndon Johnson in May 1966.


 

Though eight score minus one year

(minor emendation regarding time frame
since original date I crafted poem)
Appomattox, a psychological balm
helped stitch frayed nation to calm
until hell on earth 
killed, obliterated, and rained napalm,
(a portmanteau of two

of the constituents

of the original thickening

and gelling agents:

coprecipitated aluminium salts

of naphthenic acid

and palmitic acid)

served as silent psalm

since bombardment at Fort Sumter qualm
including intervening wars
such as raging battles on the Somme
and the war between 
Northern and Southern Vietnam.


 

National holiday most adept

at uniting Civil War fallen soldiers 
when fiercely armed 
as brothers in arms crept
taking pages from playbook 
of previous brilliant ploys
fueled the battle plans except 
when they went off script

against opposing forces, which took 
by surprise “enemies” or found inept

ill prepared troops with surprise mortal 
blow which ambushed attackers leapt

mowing down valiant soldiers, thus 
becoming slain grooms who eternally slept

sorrowful lamentable hymns from 
widowed brides tears wept.


 

Cease fire that day

terminating internecine flay

o’er mounds of earth whence 
bones o boys donned blue or gray

a day of remembrance for those 
who died in our nation's service lay

celebrated this last Monday every May

one must know tis not about division

boot about reconciliation 
and sacrifice brave heroes did pay,

the price of their lives for granted 
freedoms enjoyed as american lee-way.


 

Forsooth, now we cherish too, the Poppy red
that grows on fields where valor led,
it seems to signal to the skies
that blood of heroes never dies
acknowledged courtesy bunting
(strings of colorful, monochrome,

beige triangular flags and lengths

of fabric in the colors of national flags
engraved name upon tombstone
emblazoned words recognizing 
ultimate service to life, 
liberty and perhaps fresh cut flowers 
memorializing plethora of unspoken hashtags

gathered and draped into swags

or pleated into fan shapes) 
visibly draped and/or hung 
honoring the dead.

— Jane A. Rug, May 24, 2026

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Region, Country: PA, USA

Favorite Poets: Robert Burns, Charles Dickens, Robert Frost, Matthew Scott Harris, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Sylvia Plath, Gary Snyder, Henry David Thoreau, Walt Whitman

More from this author

Critiques

neopoet

neopoet

1 week 5 days ago

Neopoet AI [2025-04]

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:

This poem ambitiously tackles the complex and solemn subject of Memorial Day, weaving historical references with reflections on sacrifice and remembrance. The effort to blend contemporary language—such as “hashtagged” and “buzzfeed”—with traditional poetic forms creates a striking contrast that underscores the tension between modern commemoration and the enduring gravity of war’s cost.

Strengths: - The poem’s scope is broad, encompassing historical milestones, battlefield imagery, and cultural symbols like the poppy and bunting, which enrich the thematic texture. - The use of varied diction, from formal (“forsooth,” “o’er the redoubt”) to colloquial (“poo whet tick rhyme,” “ass strew turf”), adds a distinctive voice that challenges conventional solemnity and invites deeper engagement. - The inclusion of chemical details about napalm is unexpected and lends a sobering factual weight that contrasts with the poem’s more lyrical moments.

Areas for improvement: 1. **Clarity and coherence:** The poem’s dense layering of images and shifts in tone sometimes obscure the central message. For example, lines like “well fought over ass strew turf” and “electric kool-aid acid test” may confuse readers unfamiliar with these references or their intended metaphorical significance. Consider refining or contextualizing such phrases to enhance accessibility without sacrificing complexity.

2. **Rhythm and flow:** The poem’s irregular line lengths and punctuation create a somewhat fragmented reading experience. Introducing more consistent rhythmic patterns or deliberate pauses could help guide the reader through the transitions between historical narrative, personal reflection, and cultural commentary.

3. **Structural organization:** The poem moves between historical facts, personal musings, and symbolic imagery in a way that occasionally feels disjointed. Grouping related ideas into clearer stanzas or sections might improve the overall cohesion and impact.

4. **Tone consistency:** The interplay between humor, irony, and reverence is intriguing but occasionally jarring. For instance, the self-referential stanza about “a reasonable poo whet tick rhyme” injects levity but interrupts the solemn mood. Clarifying the intended effect of these tonal shifts could strengthen the poem’s emotional resonance.

5. **Line breaks and formatting:** Some enjambments and line breaks appear arbitrary, which can disrupt the poem’s pacing and emphasis. Reconsidering these choices to highlight key phrases or images would enhance readability and thematic emphasis.

Overall, the poem’s ambitious engagement with Memorial Day’s history and symbolism is commendable. Focusing on clarity, structural coherence, and tonal balance will help the poem communicate its powerful themes more effectively to a broad audience.

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