Chat self portrait

Chat Self Portrait
by Dawningdaytripper, mona, SAK, Sinthya, Esker and Weirdelf
[a round robin poem created in chat on Saturday night]

I am rigid with suspicion
sometimes
i move to the beat of my own drum
I look around a crowd of no-one
faceless automitons of sameness
empty souls

my heart pounds from the thought of the past.
I can live with that friend.
Standing alone in a crowd. 
Thinking outloud. 
I my friends have yet to begin. 
The killing machine inside me.

is this crowd of empty souls just mine?
thoughts of blood attach memories rotten
so I will go to find him,
he is there ,some where
i'm in need of help,
in need of someone to love.

the sun hones against the sky  
shiver blue in its cut of hue
Looking to the North. 
finding frost. 
Standing by a tree.
i look and think he has been found
but, it is only shadow of my memories
visited me in that hopeful moment.

i hope to see him again
I miss him
I do miss that we of me
my tears flow as i think of the way he held me
or is it the me of we?
oh ,here he is
(no need for sadness)
No need for sadness no need for smiles
no need for time lost. 
Just smile as
you woke today on the top side of the grass.