I miss you so ..........

I miss you so .............

Oh Dear Mum and Dad .... I miss you so.... even after all these years
I often sit and reminisce, and try to hold back my tears.
Sometimes my tears are of losing you and the pain I feel inside.
How lost and lonely I can feel, yet try, always to hide

Sometimes my tears don't come through pain, but from happy times we had.
Your last words to me I remember them, Can you remember Dad?
We sat upon your bedside, knowing times not on our side....
You held my hand and held me close through floods of tears I cried

"One day you will forget all this", Thats what you said at first
"One day you will realise, this illness's not a curse"
"One day the sadness will disappear and the happy times shine through"
"One day you will laugh at the memories we had, just me and you."

"I've had my time", you told me, "I'll move on to the the next whatever",
" I will be at peace and out of pain pastures new endeavor".
"My shell will be all that remains of me, my body cold and left behind"
"My soul moved on to higher realms, tranquility to find".

"From there I will look out for you", You told me with a smile
I think you have always been there through my triumphs and my trials
But we never thought for a moment Mother dear would go as well
Of course we should have realised though no one could foretell

Suddenly with you both gone, I felt so fragile and alone
but like you said my children gave me strength when I reached home
They turned my tears of sorrow, into smaller tears of joy
My children little angels sent from heaven as decoy

It's true you know what you said then, those words whilst sat with you
I no longer feel the pain inside when I think of both you two.
but still I feel that lonliness knowing we are far apart.
I keep you both alive in my dreams, and close within my heart

As time goes by it heals for sure, over many many years
It slowly helps one understand Death isn't there to fear
For one thing we all know for sure, is with life death one day will follow.
And yes there is no doubting that the feeling left is hollow.

But now I sit and think of you my Darling Mum and Dad
As very special people, Im so lucky to have had
I feel comfort now, together again, you both will stay
And continue to see you in my dreams and keep you safe I pray

I talk to you there and it feels so good, almost as if you're both still here
I can see your eyes your loving smiles feel you both so near
Thats where I get my comfort, where I fill that wanting void
Life after Death I wondered? is there one I toyed?

But if I keep you both alive in my heart, my mind and in my dreams
You cant have ever left at all , thats how it sometimes seems
So that is where I keep you, safe from harms cruel way
And love and see you daily and that is where you both shall stay .

Til one day I may join you, many many years to come
Because I have my children now to whom I must be Mum
Like you and Mum were there for me I know I have to be there to
I wonder can I ever be as Good as MUM and YOU?