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Jordyn Alyssa
Jordyn Alyssa
Follow Jordyn Alyssa
Apr 15, 2026 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
This poem is part of the contest:

Neopoet Weekly 04/12/26 to 04/18/26

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Crop Circles

Stuck in this loop;
Where does it end?
And where does it begin?

I win and I lose.
But then, I lose my win.
And then, I win my lose.

I can‘t see where I‘m going,
But I know I‘ll go there.

Is this place good?
Good for me?
Or is it good for the bad parts of me?
Or maybe even bad for the good parts of me.

I keep going round and round,
Will I ever get out?

I know I keep asking all these questions, but I can‘t help it.
I need to know.
Am I actually stuck in this loop or am I just stuck in my thoughts of delirium

About This Poem

Last Few Words: I wrote this in about 10 mins when I was on the way to work so while I know I could do better, I of course could have done worse so instead I just did my best

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Not actively editing

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

More from this author

Comments

Geezer

Geezer

1 week 1 day ago

I get the idea... 

   

I like the short choppy lines, kind of like you are awakening from one of those dreams.
However, I think that there is something that you have overlooked. The form of [ lose], should change when you use it in the line: "And then, I win my lose". It should be, "And then, I win my loss". I'm guessing that you might also try working those longer lines in the end, too.

Yes, we can always do better. Keep writing, keep trying, you are doing great. ~ Geezer.

 

Jordyn

Jordyn

1 week ago

Hello,Yeah i do agree on the…

Hello,

Yeah i do agree on the loss part. I think i meant to type that but since i was in the car and just kinda free handing it thats what i put. But also my phones keyboard isnt in english so that might have something to do with it haha 😅

Geezer

Geezer

1 week ago

Yeah...

I understand, I have trouble getting my phone to say what I want, and mine is in English.
Please don't text and drive. You just got here, I don't want your next text to be from a hospital bed, or while you are sitting in court waiting to pay a ticket.