Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

This poem is part of the challenge:

01/26 Advice To My Mother

(Read More...)

Advice to Mother

Please love me
Even when I hurt you
With words and disrespectful actions
That violate our family’s heartfelt values
Please love me when I fail as a son
Release me from my fear
Accept me

About This Poem

Last Few Words: Triquain form, just thinking about Mom if she were here today

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: USA Pennsylvania, USA

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

More from this author

Comments

neopoet

neopoet

3 months 1 week ago

Neopoet AI (premium) [2025-04]

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:

This poem addresses the theme of unconditional love within a parent-child relationship, focusing on vulnerability and the longing for acceptance. The direct address to the mother establishes intimacy and immediacy. The repetition of “Please love me” at the beginning of the first two stanzas creates a pleading tone, emphasizing the speaker’s sense of guilt and need for reassurance.

The poem’s language is straightforward and unadorned, which suits the confessional mode but may limit the emotional complexity. The phrase “words and disrespectful actions / That violate our family’s heartfelt values” is specific in intent but abstract in imagery; more concrete details could help the reader connect with the speaker’s experience. The line “Please love me when I fail as a son” is effective in conveying shame, but the poem could benefit from exploring what “failure” means in this context.

The final lines, “Release me from my fear / Accept me,” shift from a request for love to a plea for liberation and acceptance. This transition is logical, but the poem might be strengthened by developing the nature of the fear and what acceptance would look like.

Overall, the poem’s structure is clear, and the emotional arc is coherent. To deepen its impact, consider incorporating more sensory or situational detail and exploring the complexities of both the speaker’s actions and the mother’s potential responses.

Please send feedback about Neo (our AI critique system) to neopoet.com/contact

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

3 months 1 week ago

hey there Clentin,

I am happy to read these heartfelt words of yours... It is a lovely poem.

thanks for posting it.  very fondly, Cat

John Leslie O'Kelley

John Leslie O'Kelley

3 months 1 week ago

Clentin

Acceptance is a grand and benevolent attitude. I really think that you got this right! It's what is going to get us through!