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Lavender
Lavender
Oct 30, 2025 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Dancing

sounding like tap shoes
rain pit-pats along my path
my umbrella spins

— Lavender, Oct 30, 2025

About This Poem

Last Few Words: I love ambling in the gentle rain...

Style/Type: Structured: Eastern

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: United States

Favorite Poets: I tend to read Ted Kooser, Jim Harrison, Billy Collins, Paul Simon, Robert Frost. I like minimalist poetry, and poems reflecting on nature and Mother Earth.

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Critiques

RM

Ray Miller

7 months 1 week ago

Dancing

Very nice. Maybe "rain pitpats along my path", bit of a rhyme there too. 

Lavender

Lavender

7 months 1 week ago

Hello, Ray,

Thank you for reading and spending time here.  I very much like your suggestion and will gratefully use it.  I was going for a more metallic sound referring to the taps on the shoes, but the soft rain sound is noted, too.  I also like the alliteration and the forward/backward appearance of "tap" "pat"(s).  

Thanks, again!

L

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

7 months 1 week ago

Lovely Lady Lavender,

I kind of like Ray's suggestion. Your little poem reminds me of how I roamed city streets in the rain. No umbrella though...I let the rain mingle with my tears... I was such a drippy, dreary sort,  I would write poetry in my head.

much love, Cat

Lavender

Lavender

7 months 1 week ago

Hello, Cat,

Thank you!  Yes, the umbrella here has little use for coverage as it spins along to the rhythm of the rain!

Thank you, as always, for reading!

Lx

I can understand how walking in the rain created poetry in your mind!  :)

Rula

Rula

7 months 1 week ago

Awsome

As always my dear romantic friend..

An intriguing thought indeed .

Thank you for sharing.

Unca Fez

Unca Fez

7 months ago

I Love Haikus

I love haikus. They are the epitome of efficiency, something that an engineer like me can appreciate. Yours evokes an immediate memory that includes all my senses. Very well done.

Steve

Lavender

Lavender

7 months ago

Hello, Steve,

I enjoyed writing this almost as much as walking in the rain. 

Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts!

L