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Oct 30, 2025
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Dancing
sounding like tap shoes
rain pit-pats along my path
my umbrella spins
About This Poem
Last Few Words: I love ambling in the gentle rain...
Style/Type: Structured: Eastern
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Ray Miller
5 months 3 weeks ago
Dancing
Very nice. Maybe "rain pitpats along my path", bit of a rhyme there too.
Lavender
5 months 3 weeks ago
Hello, Ray,
Thank you for reading and spending time here. I very much like your suggestion and will gratefully use it. I was going for a more metallic sound referring to the taps on the shoes, but the soft rain sound is noted, too. I also like the alliteration and the forward/backward appearance of "tap" "pat"(s).
Thanks, again!
L
Candlewitch
5 months 3 weeks ago
Lovely Lady Lavender,
I kind of like Ray's suggestion. Your little poem reminds me of how I roamed city streets in the rain. No umbrella though...I let the rain mingle with my tears... I was such a drippy, dreary sort, I would write poetry in my head.
much love, Cat
Lavender
5 months 3 weeks ago
Hello, Cat,
Thank you! Yes, the umbrella here has little use for coverage as it spins along to the rhythm of the rain!
Thank you, as always, for reading!
Lx
I can understand how walking in the rain created poetry in your mind! :)
Michael Anthony
5 months 3 weeks ago
Lovely haiku , L - wonderful!
Lovely haiku , L - wonderful!
Lavender
5 months 3 weeks ago
Hello, Michael,
"Twas a lovely rain!
Thank you for reading!
L
Rula
5 months 3 weeks ago
Awsome
As always my dear romantic friend..
An intriguing thought indeed .
Thank you for sharing.
Lavender
5 months 3 weeks ago
Hello, My Friend!
A bit of respite in the refreshing rain...
Thank you for visiting!
Lx
BlueSkies
5 months 3 weeks ago
A beautiful Haiku. Well…
A beautiful Haiku. Well done!
Lavender
5 months 3 weeks ago
Hello, BlueSkies,
Thank you for reading and your generous comment!
L
BlueSkies
5 months 3 weeks ago
Lavender,
You're welcome. Much deserved. :)
Unca Fez
5 months 2 weeks ago
I Love Haikus
I love haikus. They are the epitome of efficiency, something that an engineer like me can appreciate. Yours evokes an immediate memory that includes all my senses. Very well done.
Steve
Lavender
5 months 2 weeks ago
Hello, Steve,
I enjoyed writing this almost as much as walking in the rain.
Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts!
L