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Apr 07, 2024
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Learning to fly!
Seized by a gust of wind
caught by complete surprize,
but he knew enough as well
just to hold on tight!
Up, up and away
heading towards the sky.
Umbrella clenched in death grip
he rose up four feet high.
His mother grabbed his shoe
and pulled him to her side.
Another crazy incident
that could have gone awry!
— Leslie, Apr 07, 2024
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About This Poem
Last Few Words: This was a true experience, however I know it can use a lot of help. You can critique it how you will. I will take any suggestions.
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Critiques
Lavender
2 years 1 month ago
Learning To Fly!
Hello, Leslie,
So this really happened? How scary at the moment, and how wild looking back! I think you've captured this unique incident with its whimsy and its possibilities to go "awry." Lovely loose rhyme which adds to its novelty!
Thank you!
L
John Leslie O'Kelley
2 years 1 month ago
L.
Thank you for your comment. It definately was a scary thing. My former spouse pulled him down out of traffic. I thought that my son was going over the fence into the soccer field!