Nature of Lover

The sun, appears huge, sets on the flat African horizon,
Painting the sky with fiery hues, a mixture of burning passion.
I feel a surge of emotion, comes from nature, mother nature.
As I watch the light turn to dark, goodbye my love, I shall be waiting for you,
I am the unwavering faith, everpresent universe.

The moon rises in the darkness, silver reflection off the river, meandering.
I know of a sadness, an entire day’s worth,
The stars cannot decide on or off, faint and so distant.
I feel the light, you once again come to me,
Fresh, I delight in you.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: USA the bay state, United Kingdom, Australia, South Africa, Nigeria, Canada, Europe, USA

Favorite Poets: Mary Oliver: Known for her accessible and spiritual poetry that draws heavily on observations of the natural world. She often finds profound lessons and connections in the mundane, from a walk in the woods to the flight of a bird. , Robert Frost: While sometimes seen as a poet of rural life, his work is rich with observations of nature, which he often uses to explore themes of human isolation, choices, and the relationship between humanity and the natural world. , Walt Whitman: A central figure in American poetry, he celebrated nature as a force of unity and a reflection of the human spirit. His work often connects the individual to the vastness of the cosmos and the natural world. , William Wordsworth: A key figure in the Romantic movement, he emphasized the spiritual and emotional connections., Jess Taper: his profess of concentrated awareness of experience in poetry in true freestyle was profound.

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Comments

neopoet

2 years 1 month ago

Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Nature of Lover" uses vivid imagery to convey a sense of longing and love. The use of natural elements such as the sun, moon, and stars as metaphors for emotions and experiences adds a layer of depth to the poem. However, there are areas where the poem could be improved.

Firstly, the transition between the sun setting and the moon rising feels abrupt. Consider using transitional phrases or sentences to smooth this change and maintain the flow of the poem.

Secondly, the line "The stars cannot decide on or off, faint" is unclear. If the intention is to convey the stars' indecisiveness or their faint appearance, consider rephrasing for clarity.

Lastly, the phrase "I am faith" seems disconnected from the rest of the poem. If the intention is to convey the speaker's steadfastness in waiting for their love, consider expanding on this idea or integrating it more seamlessly into the poem.

Overall, the poem has a strong emotional core and uses beautiful imagery. By focusing on transitions, clarity, and thematic consistency, it could be further improved.

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