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SE
Sarah Elizabeth Couch
May 27, 2014 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Winter Solstice

Tonight I heard a snowflake
In fractal notation
Whisperings of dark winter
And death's final moments

In hushed hibernation
Unaware of his slumber
He is timed to replenish
One two three, one two three

Suspended in stillness
Yet timed to perfection
A new springtime birth
Repeated in verse

Awakened to life
He rejoices in momentum
To all that springs around him
Dew drops in the morn

He is unaware of the slumber
He knows not of its terms
He knows only of the moment
Springtime repeated in verse

About This Poem

Last Few Words: Edit number one :-)

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Melbourne, Australia

More from this author

Comments

S

scribbler

11 years 5 months ago

Greetings Sarah

Welcome to the asylum lol. It's a bit late at night to give in depth critique but I Did like this. The imagery was good an the metaphors solid though not over powering............stan

Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

11 years 5 months ago

Sarah

I like the way you gave spring and winter their universal connection (death and rebirth) both existing in the same moment over and over. The circle of life in the natural scheme of things
Bravo!

Eddie

S

Sarah Elizabet…

11 years 5 months ago

Thank you Eddie :-)

Thank you Eddie :-)

I am interested in the idea of moment to moment creation - death and rebirth over and over.

Living in the now is difficult at first, within a world that seems to live fixated on things that aren't happening or have passed. It is always possible though to exist again, moment passes, new moment beings :-)

Eduardo Cruz

Eduardo Cruz

11 years 5 months ago

Sarah

When you get a chance read Ecker Tolle He is the authority on living in the now.
We must look at the pass as only a tool, not as a loss. The moment is where we apply the pass as to not make the same mistakes again. It is important not to live there we can not resolve pass problems only those that are happening now. We can not think we can live in the future because the future for us is happen now, in a blink of an eye it is gone all that remains is the experience of it. The future is a blank page as in poetry it will only happen as we create it.

Eddie