M4GG0TM3NT4L

Member since December 12, 2022

Member for 3 years, 5 months

member

44 Poems

56 Comments

1 Follower

Most recent

Another poem about love.

Posted Feb 5, 2024 · 30 lines · 1 critiques

Love is like
Smoke that never meets the atmosphere.
staying in stasis just beneath the clouds.
A cooling oasis ebbing and flowing under
a twilight sky.
I look at you, and we're ebbing and flowing too.
Nights spent crying and
worrying alone.
I feel you there, you're deep in my bones.
Haunting me, flowing through me.
Love is like,
How I feel I don't know you but at the same time
We've been together for 20 years.
I know your love, your fears,

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You ebb from me, often, daily,
Then flow, flow, flow,
I don't know why, I don't need to.
Because, Love is
being patient, hoping you'll get better.
Our hearts
and veins, are entwined, tangled
pulsing in sync, can you hear it?
It gets so loud sometimes.
Eardrum bursting, insufferable.
I rest assure knowing,
we will die as one, just as we lived,
Love is,
rotting away together, in a lonely field of sunflowers.
The one we planned to go to,
sometime ago.

M4GG0TM3NT4L’s timeline

February 2024
05 Mon

Posted a poem
Another poem about love.
"Love is like"
Open thread 30 lines
January 2024
30 Tue

Received a critique
on 28 from @Geezer
"that the story is most intriguing and tells the tale of our closest relative. Looking at the eyes of any "great ape", seeing the interest in the world around them, should tell you all you need to know. I see your point…"
30 Tue

Received a critique
on 28 from @Lavender
"I don't visit zoos any longer. I know they have their value in certain situations, but I just can't be a part of the crowd peering in. Your poem is almost hard to read, its content so intense. But it is full of compassi…"
29 Mon

Posted a poem
28
"Beady eyes of the ape peer through bars of a cage."
Open thread 20 lines
December 2023
16 Sat

Received a critique
on 27 from @Geezer
"have to do with the magic number in the death of young celebrities? What can you hear breathing? The grass won't sway in the wind if everything is quiet and still. That sound[s] delete the [ess] feeding [from] my warmth…"
16 Sat

Posted a poem
27
"Shiiiiiiiiiiirkkk."
Open thread 30 lines
12 Tue

Anniversary
One year of membership
November 2023
03 Fri

Posted a poem
Love's yesterday. (26)
"I can feel your heartbeat,"
Open thread 30 lines
02 Thu

Critiqued
"Turning 30" by @Celso G. Tertins
"Short but sweet, very good pacing. a little vague but i think you are meaning to convey fear of aging and mortality. (or i am just projecting). the language use is very pretty. i really like the line about mushrooms. i…"
01 Wed

Received a critique
on 25 (Out of my mind) from @Lavender
"Very visceral feelings. I sense the frustration and the "personal hell." I hope it helps a bit to write your poetry. Strong imagery and language. Thank you, L"
01 Wed

Critiqued
"murmuration" by @Lavender
"i really like the formatting in the stanzas. your use of language is very pretty, and makes me think vividly of a swan, if that makes sense. pretty simple over all (thats not a bad thing). i look forward to reading more…"
October 2023
31 Tue

Received a critique
on 25 (Out of my mind) from @Geezer
"I thought that you had veered off the emotional path that you had set for this one. Then I realized that it was intentional after the next few lines. In the fourteenth line "lays whispers only I can hear"; you should [u…"
30 Mon

Critiqued
"The Vampire" by @Alex Tanner
"I read this in a pretty deep voice for whatever reason. very good rhythm. the last line in particular "then she is gone." is amazing. i look forward to seeing more of your work!!"
30 Mon

Posted a poem
25 (Out of my mind)
"the humming,"
Open thread 38 lines
13 Fri

Critiqued
"Fabulous Freddy" by @RoseBlack
"very well worded, short but sweet! i really like this poem, perfect mix of spooky and fun!!"
September 2023
26 Tue

Posted a poem
24 (and?)
"I think I hate myself."
Open thread 33 lines
July 2023
28 Fri

Posted a poem
23 [end of a life.]
"I'm thinking about"
Open thread 30 lines
17 Mon

Received a critique
on 22 (Pure machinery) from @Geezer
"that even though I've been writing and posting for a long time now, I still get anxious to post something and rush it before it's simmered into soup. Not to worry, there is always time to put things right, take suggesti…"
17 Mon

Received a critique
on 22 (Pure machinery) from @Geezer
"all of us! We wear out, we mess up if misaligned, we need constant adjustment. That adjustment needs to come through learning; explore, try new stuff! It doesn't have to be a huge jump. Hey, even if you just look around…"
16 Sun

Posted a poem
22 (Pure machinery)
"At this point,"
Open thread 51 lines
14 Fri

Received a critique
on 21. ( All that was left behind) from @Geezer
"to remember to call you that, but somehow, it never works, I'm still fluttering about, trying to remember, while I'm looking at your M4GG0M3NT4L. What the hell did she say that I could call her? LoL I will keep trying…"
13 Thu

Posted a poem
21. ( All that was left behind)
"A place of worship"
Open thread 48 lines
June 2023
14 Wed

Posted a poem
20 [or, only human.]
"Sinew, was your name,"
Open thread 39 lines
08 Thu

Posted a poem
19 (And all that follows after)
"Time goes on,"
Open thread 25 lines
May 2023
26 Fri

Posted a poem
18.
"you sit alone,"
Open thread 58 lines
22 Mon

Critiqued
"going super sayan 2 take 2" by @the mad anarchist
"as i cannot see you i do not know if you are black/poc or not. but i don't think we are supposed to say slurs regardless according to the community guidelines..."
19 Fri

Critiqued
"THE MEDIA WHORE" by @Ruby Lord
"I really relate to this on a personal level, the need to be wanted and validated,,,, the language use here is lovely!"
15 Mon

Highest posting month
May 2023 — 13 poems
12 Fri

Critiqued
"Weird High School Love Circle" by @eda
"i envision a revolving door when i read this, your language use is pretty much perfect, but a little clunky. very fun though!! i'm not sure if you meant it to be light hearted (which is a good thing imo) or not, but it…"
12 Fri

Critiqued
"A tribute to my mother" by @Viviana Smith
"I hope this poem helped you cope with what has happened to you in some way. this poem is stark, and raw. i relate to it somewhat myself even. it reminds us not everyone is blessed with perfect parents."
January 2023
10 Tue

New follower
@Candlewitch
December 2022
12 Mon

First publication
1
12 Mon

First critique offered
on "Pissy Feet" (since unpublished) by @markold
12 Mon

Joined Neopoet
Membership begins

First poem published 1 days later.

About Me

About me

she/they
mentally ill lesbo

Location: amurica

Contest Wins

This member has not yet won any contests.

Workshops

Followed By

Candlewitch

on 28 from @Geezer

on 28 from @Lavender

on 27 from @Geezer

One year of membership

"Turning 30" by @Celso G. Tertins

on 25 (Out of my mind) from @Lavender

"murmuration" by @Lavender

on 25 (Out of my mind) from @Geezer

"The Vampire" by @Alex Tanner

"Fabulous Freddy" by @RoseBlack

on 22 (Pure machinery) from @Geezer

on 22 (Pure machinery) from @Geezer

on 21. ( All that was left behind) from @Geezer

"going super sayan 2 take 2" by @the mad anarchist

"THE MEDIA WHORE" by @Ruby Lord

May 2023 — 13 poems

"Weird High School Love Circle" by @eda

"A tribute to my mother" by @Viviana Smith

on "Pissy Feet" (since unpublished) by @markold

Membership begins

About Me

Recent Work

Contest Wins

Workshops

Followed By